SCARBOROUGH    16th.  December 1915*
(I think this is wrong)

My Dearest one,

Two letters this happy afternoon, arriving together, breathless, while I prepared for P.T.  The one written on the sofa to the other in our, I say OUR bed, the one on Saturday the other on Sunday, dear loving letters.  And so soon I shall see you in our bed, at the Victoria.

To Klaus please say, “I say Klaus, message for you, in morse that is VE … …- .) David says thanks a lot for the nice letter, the fun letter, which delighted him.  As his crossed yours he’s answering this way.  He’s glad you had a party with green frilly stuff on the table and hopes that Dickie didn’t overdo the eating.  He hopes you have a Good Time at Romsey and he will write before Christmas.  He liked the letter and still kicks himself from time to time because he thought the twelfth was the tenth.  He sends his love, exemplified by a clout on the left ear.”

All this morning out on the Moors with Cable laying parties, it all went well and Mr. Rose our officer, with a childish pair of eyes and a childish mouth, was delighted and so was sergeant, who has been a Rolling Stone, tramped in Canada, been down and out and up and in and is in the army for another 16 years and has a girl but doesn’t quite know. . . .

On Sunday shall we go to Church and on Christmas Day, the Parish church on the hill ?  And the Royal concert on Monday when that girl is playing piano again ?  And the theatre which is a dear little repertory company, and the pictures, and walks and reads and sleeps and snoozes and play and fun and games ?  The days will be spent with my eyes on the wrist watch.  The next chapter is shaping in my mind though not much on paper, I groped again hard last night, but not much came, it may tonight after this.  Yes OVERWHELMING was the word and they meant it, it was Boots order and other orders and the general reception.  Not pre-publication, or they’d have said so.  Anyhow our hotel bill is paid.  Yes postpone starting on land until January 12th.  Unless your mama “gets a job”.  Or unless I get you a job.  You’d better look out for a substitute in case I do.

Oh, so Eric is quite useful to the Atkinson family, he serves his purpose.
Ahem.

Oh this morning we had to lay cables from gun positions on that actual bridge where we had lunch and lost the knife.  And my party had to take cable to an O.P. along the actual road we walked, back turn left, along that road, round at the junction after the hair slide bend on the hill, and a long that long road at the end of which we found what Candy found by a log.  My O.P. phone was by that actual log, I chose it for reasons sentimental.  Just by the main road where the Falcon should have been if it had been a good bird.  Its a hell of a way we did fifteen and a half miles I measured it on the car speedo !  Good for you.  We dashed up that road, laying cable, and tying back and making crossings and so on.  It brought tears to my throat and a lump to my eyes.  Fancy.  And really darling, the view to the left hand is grand, great purple swerving willowy skylines, and the sea at times.  So lovely.  Golden sun today.

What a thrill to see you next Saturday, Hell if I have a duty I must go to the office and arrange not to have.  One has them as an N.C.O.  you know, and they’re serious ones.  But I’ll try pulling gently on a few strings.

Dear Scarfe uncle and your beehive one talking.  And you and them talking on books and your mother all better.  But she’s a naughty silly woman and you are sweet and sane and the million times nicer girl woman wife than any other one.

Hasn’t Freddie Yarnold got his appointment at an awkward time ?  I mean, will he save the situation or what ?  Embarrassing to move into the residency and find a lot of courteous but single minded Japs there ?

Try the Erskine’s they’ll be careful all right, and when your mother comes back she can take over.  She won’t stay there for three weeks will she ?  Just Christmas week ?  Our house empty for three weeks ?  Want proper closing ?  Will Mrs. A. light fires ?  Can you pay them for this fifteenth ?  Can I help ?  How are your finances ?  Let me know and I’ll raise some for spending money.  Hotel’s all right.  Nice thought.  I must to the novel.  Christmas shopping on Saturday, together ?  Nice.  A small list, yes ?  I’ll write and revise my notes some evenings in the hotel with you.  Bring the rough novel with you my carbon copy is wooleeyy and not corrected.

Dearly beloved, write again, until Thursday.  Saturday I’ll be in a dither.  So will everyone who knows me.  Restless, twittery.  Jiggety.  Excited.  Hooray.

Dear one, a bientot, and kiss on the soft golden nose my dog, and my mother-in-law, who all the saints preserve.

Ever your own. . .

 

                        not going to bed until 1 o’clock ! Naughty Kaola-girl to keep you up so late. And then you wrote to me until even your pen grew tired and ran out. Where to ? Did it scratch at the door ? Was It blacked out. But what a great big ASS I am, tell him and explain that I never was good at dates and soldiers are awful they live from day to day and lose count. I thought I cunningly posted his letter last night to catch his birthday and it was yesterday, Pandemonium, malediction, confusion, I am sorry, I’m that sorry, will he forgive me ? Ask him. Tell him he can treat my birthday as though it were the Third of July and Pay Me Out. Oh dear. I miss you and my secretary bird (wren).

                        And no letter from me on Wednesday, but that’s absurd, Postie is a naughty man, I post your letter every night at the same time, ten to ten, on rny way to Roll Call, and it ought to arrive at the same time every day. Stands to reason. Poor darling, how I’d worry if I didn’t get a letter. Yes, its the booksordered, that’s what it is, no one could call 250 books an Overwhelming Success, could they. So all will be well and I’ll be able to sub off them, you see. But softly softly incase we have to stretch the ends. But we’ll be together if you have to work at the Victoria for another three months to pay off the bill. That’s an Idea, now. A Good Idea.

                        Sleeping Out Passes, as ordered, by Mrs. Jeffs. Local Leave seems to be off the menu. One gets a forty eight hours in the Battery if one doesn’t have to arrange them for the Squad and so stand no chance. But I’ve been balancing pros and cons. Its almost certain that S.O.P’s will be granted for Christmas Night and Christmas Eve that’s backwards, see what I mean ? But they might not. There is the chance they might tighten up discipline because everyone’s drunk. So I can either apply for the 20th and 21st. to make sure of two, or not apply not to spoil my chances for the 24th and 25th. But then if I do that and they’re not granted on the 24th. and 25th. we lose. But it would be a pity to have them on the 20th. and 21st and it not be fine weather for sailing, and then not to have them on the 24th. and 25th. because I had them, on the 20th. and 21st. All very difficult. But I’ve decided this for now. To apply for the 20th and 21st. letting happen what May, and then to try again for the 24th. and 25th. Because I think they’ll all be so drunk on the 24th. and 25th. that it’ll be all right. That way we have a certain two nights, and I think Christmas will be all right, really I do. Its a matter of a series of interwoven finely balanced possibilities. Sergeant will help all he can. And we’ll be together, that’s the great thing. Us being ussish and we can be ussish at the Vic. and not at the Pavilion or Scalby Mills, is not that so ? Bless uss.

                        Yesterday we were out cable laying all the morning out in the bright sunshine on the Moors and I was Troop N.C.O. and loved it, and in the afternoon we had wiresless sets out on the football field, all scattered about we were, twenty two sets, and we called each other up and spoke all over the air real broadcasting and they worked they did, It was a rare thrill. Great fun this signalling. And last night I sent you a silly little letter and then went out with Sgt. and Harry Poster turned up and, at the bus, little Eric, who wants to link arms with me always and follows saying Baa Baa, bles, his simple soul he is a trial. But Sgt. and I left the toher two together and saw the picture after getting ten players at a shop and then we had four beers each and saw the picture and afterwards Sausage and mash and choclate ( the drink) and then walked happily home and it was very sultry, hot almost in greatcoats and today we paraded without them it was so hot, Indian Summer.

                        A Parcel from Mother this afternoon, full of wicked things like a jar of Honey and lots of water biscuits and half a pound of pettit bueurre and seven Large Apples and some real butter and some cream cheese, I’m drinking China tea and eating water biscuits and butter and cheese with an apple in the offing, behind the inkpot. I have no tea pot so I make it in one mug, put & book over the top and pour it into another mug, very good idea. No milk of course. But I do love you. And you can’t tell about the 20th. week-end, I mean and what does it matter, so long as you are here. After all I speeded up the day of coming, didn’t I. You’ll feel well, yes ? Its a relief about Kaola, but are you sure, bears are deceptive things. Still your good at kittens and you ought to be good at Kaolas. Its a relief, and she can come to bed with us when I m home if she dare ! I can seeher clinging to that peg in the kitchen now !!! Yet I wonder, yes, I wonder. Maybe it accounts for the hot tummy.

                        Dear Candy. What about the Erskines ? Uncle Jack doesn’t want some silken gold on his hearth rug ? Would Candy feel shy and overcome ? If its a problem you might say it is.

                        How most odd about the Canadian and the Post Office ! Were we to pliant to St. Anthony and did we let him just tell us what he, from his greater height, could see. Its odd , very.

                        Seeing how things are about Christmas tine, is it not propitious ? I mean, don’t certain sequences of days, or nights, lend themselves, better to war work of certain kinds. Has St. Anthony arranged it, v/ith the twenty third in his diary as the day of your arrival. And with a real Hotel one can go and come as one pleases, which is a nice thought, and one can get Late Passes quite easily. Strolling back in the moonlight, or the dark can be pleasant, being retrospectively minded.

                        I say, is that true about books  filtering through ? Then the Orders Will Be fulfilled. Look out for ads. in the Sunday Papers, we don’t have decent ones here and the press cutters don’t send them. So will you if they do ?

                        No novel yet, because last night I was out and this night I’ve been struggling with a stain on my greatcoat in the back. I think hot water and soap has done it. I hope so.

                        Much do I love you, and now its only a few nights, and I’ll speak to you on Sunday as usual. Bless, you, dearest and make Klaus forgive me.

SCARBOROUGH. THE TENTH DAY OF DECEMBER 1941.                Tuesday

 My Dearest,
Two delightful letters from you, the one written on Saturday night in bed and the other on Sunday night, each carrying over to the next day and full of home and you and stories and anecdotes and cyclings to Stratford and Mrs. A going to Haselor and the blurry furryness of my home. Dear letters read on the foot of my bed after duty this afternoon and before I took the Fire Watchers Parade, that being my duty this evening.

Yes, bless you, the Victoria it is, and its not so bad because you’ll be there first, and Harry is taking his wife away to the boarding house after Christmas and you can just be yourself and sit alone and read and we’ll  get a chair in your room if you like.   And the Pavilion can go without and one day it’ll regret it.    Oh dear, not long now, only Tuesday evening Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday Thursday and Friday and then……Yorricks ahoy.

Thornoton is an old woman, he’s been gossiping and chattering talking at an incoherent speed, to a crony in the next room for over an hour.   He’s a regular Mrs. A.   Did Mr A do anything to the garden.

I didn’t want KLAUS to get me a cigarette lighter, but Father Claus, it was a JOKE, and Joke Over, because I’ve heard from the inscrutable Capes and its all very odd. Either they have other indications for the use of the word Overwhelming or they’re crackers, because they’ve only sold 1660 copies altogether, and as they’d sold 1406 before publication that’s 254 altogether, which doesn’t seem at all overwhelming to me! So I’ve written off asking them if that is right, and why they considered it good; and what the hell.   I’ll know more in due course. But don’t get deflated. They did write as you saw, and they are reprinting and advertising, and we shall sell a lot and make some money.    But not yet, so our pulses must beat steadier and we must remain, and its rather nice, isn’t it, as poor as ever.    Its better so.  But we’ll have our Christmas and stay at the Victoria and avoid the extra splashes and be happy with ourselves, our books, some walks on the moors (mistless this time) and some pictures, but above all, ourselves, the Best Things In Life Are Free.   So hang on to your Christmas card money and I’ll have your card money here and I’ll sell some books if they come through it time, I’ll damn well open a stall in the Square and sell them, and we’ll make whoopee, because it will be all right by May 1st. when we’re paid.   So we go calm, and I am an ASS for getting excited too soon, and counting chickens before I’d seen that there was any oil in the incubator lamp. Don’t tell everyone our Great Success is only two hundred and fifty four copies, most of which I’ve bought!  Let them stick to the effect of the letter, and remember that There’s’ A Good Time Coming, and a good time anyhow, apart from mere money, at Christmas.  And we’ll afford the good old homely Victoria anyhow, Edith beams at me when she sees me and they know you are coming and all is excited, MEEEEE TOOOOO.     So put away in a Tin Box your Christmas Card money if you can, and don’t pay bills with it, use the Klausmoney and the Army money, and tell your mother and everyone that we are well off, in the future but poorer than chapel mice at the moment. Then we’ll see when the time comes. For now, hoard, and I’ll hoard, and sell cards and I’ll sell books and we’ll manage at Christmas, bless you.

It is odd, isn’t it, her letter and the fact that only 254 books have been sold!  Maybe there’s a large list of orders, that may be it, lots ordered for Christmas by booksellers, and that would show successful, maybe five thousand are ordered, of course, that would be it, its just come to me.    They sell their few, and then orders roll in and the few go and the orders remain and they print hard and tell Miss Lange who is thrilled, and the Sales people only have dry figures.    The snag is that I can’t expect a sub. on orders. I bet that’s the solution. 254 wouldn’t overwhelm Eric Hanson. Let alone Capey Lange. Good, that’s solved.

As for the tweeds can you wait till we get the actual money?    I’d imagined we could draw a hundred pounds and send you fifty in notes to go to London with, but I think that that, and the packet of notes for our two mamas must wait and we must concentrate on the ready cash for Christmas. Agree?   Not disappointed?   Slightly relieved? Hooray, you cuddlesome thing you.

If You Talk About the Virtues of That Damned Bear Again I’ll Ring wring its Blasted Neck.  With Its swagger colonial accent and its warm stomach, in MY BED, and me here, sleeping with you, cuddled, what you won’t Do To me, fussed, tucked up, arranged, admired, bloody blanket-creeper that he is.  But I can’t blame him, he’s a lucky bear, my love to him, but let him hang by his neck in the kitchen when I’m at home! GRRRRRRR.    I’m a Driver (i.e., nearly a Signaller, R.A., and a Squad Lance Bombardier, so, Colonial Bear, pipe down when I’m about.

I can’t get anything for Klaus, shall I just write to him?   Can you telephone to Kelly, or get someone to call, say, Peter, to get a book?  I’ll write to Klaus, and the book can be from us. If I’d the money we have ordered. (I’m sure that’s it) I’d send him ten bob.

I’ll find out about Candy.   What d’you honestly think? She’d be a bit of a handicap in a hotel. But would she hate the Golds? Would your mother be away Long?   Would she be back in time to release her?   Would she be unhappy and an unhappy golden Lady haunt our happiness?   You know best, you can organise best.    I’ll ask at the Victoria.   Mrs. A. wouldn’t be any good?    Or Eileen?   Eileen, that’s an idea. She’s soft over animals and would take her plenty walks and be careful and she might do it.    Try and see, ask her when she’s in the right mood, she used to have Nunk, Its a better idea than Uncle Gold, because Candy might be homesick. What d’you think? Or does she love her Uncle Gold.   Would he keep her in a Cage With No Walks and No Fire? Think and see, ask Candy and I’ll think too.

Poor Aunt Jess’ tail.

Yes, I’ll pay J.G.L. the 17/6.

There was a pause. I cleaned Thornton’s billy can and made up the fire.    I opened a tin of Heinz tomato soup my dear mother had sent me, and put it in the billy-can. I filched a little Bovril from Thornton’s store and added that, and some water, and there it sits   pink and warming, on the fire, to make me a supper in due course, while I listen to the news.    They tell me Japan’s come in the War and America’s getting in an embarrassing situation and   may have to taste war from the first time since the War of Independence. They say we shall probably be posted to Hawaiaiaiai, which is a nice thought and excites us all, you know, lotus leaves and flowers round the tummy. I’ll listen to the news and see if this is so. Japan?   Really?   Another country. Oh well, it shows Hitler’s not self sufficing.

But more importantly, Us. It is terrific, isn’t it. I read your letters so slowly and appreciatively and love every word, because its from you, and life is only an infinite series of circles, shading up to you, in the centre.    I can imagine you, graceful and vivacious and gay in your seventies, and me doing my best in my eighties, and each of us as potty as ever, and you trying not to let me see you’re wrapping me up, and me trying not to get petulant, and squiggling, and yet lost and forlorn when you are away for half an hour. You love the things I love, because I do, and its the same with me.   I’ll wear a nightshirt then, I’d like to now, really. Bring my pyjamas and all the essentials, (Ha Ha) (Subtle) won’t you, and remember the orders in Cape’s books.

My dear, this is awful! And I’ll be so dumb on the Day. Saturday Week.  And wet or fine come, but see if things can’t be arranged for it to be fine.  But if not, well, why worry, it will be fine before Christmas. Nice, if its fine though. Nothing you can do. Here’s the news, yes, Japan is in the war.
And the Russians are still there, bless them.

But you are there, and I am here, and in nine days from when you read this we shall be together.
Bless you, dearest one,
ever your own…

This evening a/d (after duty) I f/o (fade off) swiftly to tackle the Pavilion ! This I’ll get out of it as best as I can with Harry. But I write now as once out I may go to the theatre, to see “Full House” (I. Novello – . So in case you miss your  letter, here’s this one, to be posted later tonight for Saturday. Praps if I post it before 5 it’ll get there then with greater safety. As long as it doesn’t arrive on Friday.

                        Last night I did a goodly piece of novel, rewrote the last part you had. From page 9. You’ll see in due course. So I hope to come back this evening for another session. But the flesh might be weak. I’m also shopping – wrist watch strap, , ribbon for typer.

Out cable laying with trucks, out to the Moors & 6 parties of 4 have to lay a full 3 mile cable. I’ve a nice trio in my party & it’s going to be great fun & very realistic. And it’s a grand sunny wintry afternoon, too.

                        No letter from Capes yet with Facts & Figures, it may come this evening. But broke or not we’ll be together, & that’s everything.

                        9. 30. I didn’t get a chance to write any more today. The work here is pretty taught and that shows. After we came in from cable laying (& a lovely blue misty afternoon it was, too) I washed, had tea & went down town with Barry Gisling. I bought a wrist watch strap & then went to the Pavilion. They are quite full up for Christmas, & seemed dubious about the likes of me anyhow. But Hotel reception offices are ever like that. I stuck to my guns, being a true Gunner, & said, “New Year ?”. Grudgingly she said she had rooms then & I asked for a double. She said “It’ll cost you 25/- each a day” & looked for me to faint. I rose to my full height & said “Haven’t you any decent rooms ? 25/- seems very ordinary”. She looked humbled & said “no” so I said “Book me one”. Then she had an idea & said “you’ll both be using it  ?”. I said “Maybe yes, maybe no. I don’t know, but if I pay for a double room … “. She said “Oh no, the lady couldn’t use a double room alone”. So I took a single !, From 29th -3rd. But it’s not definite. She said she’d have to get it confirmed in writing. Maybe she wants to get out of it. But I’m not going to be done. If she does I’m going to see Mr. Langton & expound ! And if I get sleeping out passes we’ll tip the chamber maid & live in sin. So we stay at the Vic definitely 22 – 29 & then go over to the dashing Pavilion for the New Year, 29 – 3rd. I’ll know definitely later if I can fob Harry off with stories of New Year celebrations, because they make whoopee.

                        Dear old Vic. I had a beer there this evening, when Barry G. booked a room for his wife. The lady in the office promised to try to get me 25 room. The only consolation is that with all the Regiment there :- Mrs Lane, Porter, Gisling & Foster, you may find it easier to get away. I hope we do get a week at the Pavilion, it’s a lively place. Anyhow, the old Vic. stands expecting you.- me too.

                         No letters at all this afternoon ! The Post van left the parcels & forgot to leave the letters. They’ll come in the morning, so maybe I’ll get two tomorrow. Dear you. No more, it’s bedtime, & I’ve a busy morning. Cable laying again.

I’ve sent for six books, 3 for Williams, one for Marjorie & two for ?

Yes, tell Candy Green Morocco is a splendid idea and her feminine taste is perfect and just right. Diamonds, yes, but pink nail polish and earings, no, like her missis, she is too beautiful naked to need such ornaments. And David is sufficiently Victorian to dislike pink nail-varnish on young girls, be they never so Cocker.

                        Yes, tomorrow maybe I’ll know how much it is, and if it’s as I expect the Pavilion orthe Ritz won’t matter for our ten days at Christmas. We’ll not worry, as we always haven’t. I’ll let you know quickly.

                   Please announce at once that ALL THE CHARACTERS EXCEPT ONE ARE FICTITIOUS. For five guineas we’ll tell anyone who the one is. I daren’t come home for Leave if they think they’re in it. No-one is save the long eared one’s mother. Poor Rector.

                        I LOVE THE calendar cutting with the merry poverty line on it. Uncle (Scarf) Jack ?

                        So it was overwhelming ! That, certainly, is the word, and no other. Overwhelming, Capes, Miss Lange, you and I. Dear Klaus and his wistful remark about wealth. Tell him it’s relative, and anyhow David won’t do anything about it.

                        I’ll remember his birthday on the tenth and I’ll write and maybe if I can get down Town and see something I’ll send him a present, he’s the nearest we have got – yet – to our boy about the place. I say yet. I mean to say yet. Taradiddle.

                        This author idea has percolated throughout the regiment. I sent for six books last week, to have three for myself and in case people want them later, and then one day they’d all gone whuff, and paid for. And people call me, sergeants and things and Ask The Usual Questions.

                        Your handwriting is very charming, I’ve just been studying this afternoon’s envelope (the Monday-Tuesday) letter and its brim full of character and the nicest kind of character. I’ve got off the Sowden’s this evening and Sgt Thornton and Eric Wilson are going, which is a Clever Idea. I’d rather stay here.

                        I have darned three fingers of my gloves, ever so well, too, and have two more to do. If you come across another pair of khaki gloves do let me have them, as two pairs will help against frozen fingertips I get out cable-laying. We can only wear khaki knitted ones, so I might use two pairs. If this is possible it would be appreciated.

                        O don’t send cigarettes, if you do, in envelopes that look as though they might contain cigarettes, they are liable to be pinched, not by us but by the Military post office, Mother sent me twenty and a two bob postal order to pay for a telegram for Auntie Edie last week and it never arrived.

                        I’ve just put the kettle on for a nice quart of China tea to eat with my apple and cheese and biscuits and toast and honey and chocolate biscuits, – Oh, I’m a sly cunning luxurious sybarite of a Squad Lance Bombardier. Sergeant seems to have made me his second-in-command, because although there are six of us, four in 79 squad and two in ours, he always pulls me out to march them about and take them places and do things.

                        Major Kay is very Royal Artillery. Middle-aged, fierce, electric moustache which is light brown and splays outwards like a sort of a different kind of aerial, sharp eyes, and a way with him. Not Mitch’s insanity and constant apoplexy, but a genuine military gentleman. I’ve not had any contact with him, but his eyes seem to be on every one at Parade. I had to walk around the ranks with Sgt. this morning for the inspection and Kay hovered. I knew that one of Ted Williams’s overcoat belt buttons were off under his respirator, and it was awful, betraying the Major not to expose it, betraying Ted if I had, so I didn’t. Horrible walking the ranks of 46 of them gazing into nothingness all rigid. Dear souls.

                        We are in E Block, on the floor, but with lockers. Those left behind are sore, but is just the sort liable to be get sore who get left behind, which is life.

                        Is Communism jealousy ?

                        A Whitley went silly over us in the rugger field this afternoon, as we were lamp signalling in pairs, banked and swooped just over our heads, the great booby.

                        I use red type because the black is wearing thin.

                        Of course Marjorie shall have a book for Christmas. I’d better by six more ! I’ve got one of my own, and that’s all left. I’ll see if anyone else here wants one for Christmas. We’d better buy up Kelly’s copies.

                        That little letter was the sort of thing one would indulge in weak minded day dreams and then cancel at once is being naughty. I mean, overwhelming. Anthony’s arranged it, if we are to be in the money, then we can’t squander it.

                        I’m very very glad, that of all the people who like to book, the wise and dear Little Spider was one. Bless him, how he pops in and out from time to time.

                        No more boot polishing, and Northern Command Order has come through today, saying Dubbin in future. Sensible and practical.

                        How I love you. 18 days and I’ll show it, yes I will, like billio I will. How much how much how much. And as you have been, as you are and as you will be for ever.

                        Does Miss Dolbin Know yet ?

                        Fancy Miss Chamberlain having a copy of the book. Well.

                        Bless you, my dearest one, write tonight, cuddly in bed, on the mattress which so suits you. In the light of that table lamp, green blankets and a touch of gold in the chair.